I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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