Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
