its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
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