When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
