Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
