South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Randomize
