Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
home. puking in laundry basket.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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