Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Swine flu is the new snow day.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
