WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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