why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
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