Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
