I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
