Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Randomize