The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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