actually, I'm a sock model
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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