She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
they're like a gay fantastic four
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
