You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
