what day is it and did you see me today?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
he fucked my hip out of place.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
