My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
