im gay
i know
yea but for you.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
