Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
