which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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