I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
jump out the window naked night went bad
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
