oh god the rape fog is back!
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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