i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize