You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
