I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
not ubering you a puppy
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize