the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
