And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
