does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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