I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
