NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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