ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
