Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
