I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize