Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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