he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
