New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
