is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
