yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
