Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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