singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I have surprise drugs for everyone
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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