so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I checked into jail on foursquare
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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