I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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