once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
