Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
