fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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