Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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