every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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