Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Found the puke drawer
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
